The Lost Decade

(Ok, my bad for completely lacking behind on writing blog posts. Indeed, a lot has happened in the early part of this year.)

The Lost Decade

Thanks to the now presumably dead Osama Bin Laden, I would always remember my first day in the US. It was September 10, 2001, one day before 9/11 occurred. On that September night, I would had never imagined that 1) a terrorist attack would happen the next morning, and 2) I would be spending the next ten years of my life in the US. Not really because I didn’t want to, more because I was 18, who thinks that far when you are a teenager?! (Wow, haven’t used that word in awhile!) You can truly feel your age when you can say ten years passed by in a blink of an eye. 

Japan called its worst economic period the lost decade. I’m calling my decade in the US ‘the lost decade’ for a very different reason. It’s ten years that are forever lost in history and memories, never to be taken back or re-lived again. To be honest, I cannot imagine a better place to spend my past ten years. The US was indeed the right place for me to groom myself into adulthood. I met some of my bestest friends but also lost some along the way. I experienced some of my most happiest times and also some of the solemnest moments. Just as Heraclitus rightly said so, “Change is the only constant”, things come to an end while new beginnings sprout. Ten year is indeed a nice whole number to complete my journey in the US.

Boston, I’m afraid we've finally broken up. It has been a bumpy ride but I have to say it was worth every moment. I would not be where I am now without you. But I’m still damn glad that I will no longer be cursed by your never-ending, butt-freezing winters!! ^_-

P.S. Please spare me on writing a Chinese version. I write in Chinese almost everyday now. =P

1.1.11 | 壹壹年.壹月.壹號


Swoooooosh! There goes another year. HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE!!! This year went by REALLY fast. It seems only yesterday when I wrote this. Let's see how I had done in 2010.

Well, I failed pretty miserably with Project IIIone3, didn't I? Told you Gemini's are NOT known for routines. But I did pretty well with Chinese writing. Although looking back at some of my Chinese posts, I definitely need to polish up on some diction. I'm still pleasantly surprised that I can write in Chinese that makes sense. Before I started writing, the last time I wrote a proper Chinese paragraph (let alone essay) was maybe when I was 14/15, freakin' over 10 years ago!! Doesn't seem like it, does it?

So what's next? After evaluating that doing something everyday is just NOT my thing, I'm thinking to tweak Project IIIone3 a bit for 2011 to better fit my Geminian transient behaviors. I am still very interested in documenting a year in photographs. But that's still work in progress...

I also hope to write at least one blog post per month and to focus more on current affairs. As my posts had pretty blatantly exhibited, 2010 had been quite an emotional roller coaster, hence, the very often 'Chicken soup for the soul' type of entries. But this year I want to write about things that are a lot less affectionate and a lot more controversial. Even I'm tired of my touchy self!

Without further ado, let's roll the curtains up for 2011! ^_-



我想首先回應一下KW同學的'A better year?'。我總覺得二十來歲,常常覺得不安、凡事往往不順意是很理所當然的,如果我們安於現狀,覺得自己已經做得很好,應該不變地繼續下去,那就代表我們對自己的要求太低了吧。Avatar和Titanic的導演James Cameron曾經說過"If you set your goal ridiculously high and it’s a failure, you will fail above everyone else’s success." (如果你達不到為自己定下非常非常高、高到接近不可能的目標,你的失敗已經是別人的成功了。)



(我發誓,這將是我最後一次'Chicken soup for the soul'條目。哈哈!=P)

Randy Pausch | 升呢

Randy Pausch

Twice. His energy, strength and spirit have brought me out of my self-pitying slump twice. I first found out about the Carnegie Mellon computer science professor's 'Last Lecture' on YouTube when a friend (Thanks, Chih!) posted the link on FB commemorating his life. I had no idea who he was then but was curious. So I clicked.

Blown away. I was absolutely blown away, not particularly with the content of his lecture (To be honest, I think all inspirational speeches give the same or similar message.) but simply with him as a human being.

Having witnessed how cancer can torture one's soul, I believe it takes a real strong character for someone in his conditions to speak the way he did in front of an audience. There was not a single shred of doubt, hate or even pessimism. Pure positive spirit and genuine warmth were what I felt throughout the entire lecture. (LOL It did kind of made me regret not going to CMU for undergrad.) How he had achieved that was seriously beyond my imagination. Everyone has the ability to stay strong and sound optimistic under turmoil but the underlying despair would still somehow unwittingly sieve through. Not with Randy. I could not feel anything negative whatsoever, at least not during those 75 minutes. He was absolutely brilliant!

That was 2 years ago. Randy had gradually migrated to the back of my head. Earlier this year, I was going through some personal insecurities. I admit it. It's the dreaded quarter-life crisis. I don't deny that most people around my age are a bunch of spoil brats, myself included, who think that we deserve everything in the world and that the world should run the way we want it to. When the unfortunate happens, as we like to call it, we whine, complain, say the world is not fair, and feel sorry for ourselves. To be fair, it's hard for us not to think that way. We were, or at least I was, brought up having everything that we wanted in the world and having the world run the way we wanted it to.

Anyway, Randy re-emerged back to my consciousness. I decided to buy his book. I guess a good beating is what I would call the experience of reading his book was. It slapped me out of my insecurities and kicked my self-pitying butt out of the slump. Life once again was back to charging full speed forward. Until...

A brick wall. I am currently hitting a HUGE brick wall, as Randy would call it. A wall that I am not confident I can break through. A wall that, even right now, seems like a never-ending inevitablity. Remember a couple months ago when I said I was craving to feel challenged. Yesterday I would tell you I want to take that ALL back. I don't want to feel challenged anymore. It's too much stress, too many bruises to my ego. I wholeheartedly LOATHE feeling incompetent.

Randy Pausch reappeared. Boy, am I glad I watched his lecture again today. "The brick walls are not there to keep us out; the brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something," was the central theme of his lecture. I asked myself, "How badly do I want this?" Bad. Very very BAD. "Ok. Put your retarded ego aside and go break that wall, JY!!!", I finally got the courage to say to myself.

I highly encourage everyone to either watch his lecture or read his book. (<-- Click on the links to access them.) I actually don't recommend doing both because they are practically the same thing. The book just gives a little more details about his life. I know some people, espeically men, don't believe in these gushy, self-help type of talks. But his lecture is still entertaining and fun to watch even without the emotional aspect. He is just an incredible lecturer! I wish I could have had the chance to attend one in person. RIP, Randy Pausch.


我這半個"祝星"(LOL 我知道是錯別字,我已說過我的中文是很爛的!)剛剛學懂什麼是"升呢",我覺得人一定要不斷升呢。其實,香港教育最失敗之處不是填鴨式教育,而是忽略了教導如何做一個有用的人,令到許多現今的港男港女沒有思想、沒有目標、沒有要讓自己升呢的想法和行動。




The Love of My City | 歸屬感

The Love of My City

While in Seattle waiting to board my flight back to Boston, images of my past four days in Vancouver were rolling through my mind like a Kaleidoscope. I couldn't stop thinking how much I have missed the city, my childhood friends, and the house and neighborhood that I grew up in.

It suddenly dawned on me that I can attribute the cities that I've lived in like lovers that I've fallen in love with. Here's how I'd attribute them:

Vancouver = The first love that I'll never forget. The city that contains my happiest memories. After leaving it for over a decade, I'm still in love with it!

San Diego = An ex-lover that I'm now best friends with. SD reminds me of the hardworking and ambitious self during my college days. I only wish that motivation and passion in me never die down.

Hong Kong = An ex-lover that I barely talk to. Never was, is and will probably never be a big fan of it; even though, technically, it is my true hometown. I never really feel like I belong there.

Boston = A lover that I'm still trying to breakup with. I've definitely met some great friends here but still doesn't beat the hardships that I went through. I'm sure years down the road, I'll look back on this 'relationship' and appreciate every bit of it. But right now, my loathe is blinding me from doing so. >_<

What do you think? Not a bad comparison, huh? ^_-





My Morning Coffee | 我被遺棄了

My Morning Coffee

This morning was such a tragic morning. I found out that my MOST FAVORITE morning coffee place has permanently closed down. I was in shock! I stood in front of the store dumbfounded, trying to peek through the windows to find any sign of renovations, indicating that it was only a temporary shut down. But there was nothing. 90% of the store had been cleared out. People passing by was staring at me wondering what the heck was wrong with me. Then tears started rolling.... Just kidding! I'm not that big of a drama queen... heh

But still it literally feels like someone just broke up with me. My morning coffee from Peet's is the one thing that I look forward to every morning when I wake up and what keeps me going throughout the day. Yes, I am in love with this coffee. (Well, more like it's my ecstasy, coke, weed, whatever drug you'd like to call it.) It somehow puts me into an awesomely good mood every morning that lasts the entire day, which no coffee from anywhere else can do.

But now it has left me. I have nothing to look forward to when I wake up. The coming winter looks so grim! The thought of getting warmed up by Peet's coffee is what pulls me out of bed during those bleak, gloomy days. How am I going to survive this coming winter?! T_T


咖啡對我來說一直只是用來解決我的睡魔,不是因為喜歡喝而喝,直到嚐到Peet's的咖啡,喝第一口就愛上它了。它比其他品牌的咖啡濃郁得多,味覺上有很厚的層次感,有點像紅酒品種裏的Cabarnet Sauvignon吧,有人嫌它太苦澀,我就覺得剛剛好,苦澀裏帶點甘香,是其他咖啡做不到的效果。在嚴寒的早晨裏,拿著暖暖的一杯,一口一口地喝著,暖胃又提神,真的能讓我暫時忘記那灰溜溜的天空。


Happiness = Stress?! | 遲來的春天

Happiness = Stress?!

Today, I received one of the best news in a llllooonnngggg time. But what I find surprising was that the amount of satisfaction and happiness that the news brought upon is directly proportional to my stress level. The happier I am, the more stress I'm feeling. Shouldn't they be inversely proportional? ~_~ (Gosh, how more nerdy can I be using "proportionality" to describe life?! =P)

In any case, I really treasure what I have earned today. It is a result of years of sweat, diligence and, sometimes, tears. I just hope good fortune keeps rolling my way because I'll be needing A LOT of it for the next 10 months!


四年的努力終於有成果了,差點以為這個遲來的春天永遠都不會來,想不到它在我最需要它的時候來臨,生命的起伏真的很難預計,但依然不可鬆懈,將要開始學習管理的理念了。 ^_^
Viewfinder | 尋心鏡 | TNB